Death has a fascinating influence on me. As a kid, I feared death. It made me anxious even thinking about it. Later on, this feeling has instead been exchanged by an anxiety of not living life to the fullest. That I need to make sure to tick as many boxes as possible in my thirties, in my forties and so on. This is because I will want to lay there, on the final day, when knowing that it is my final day, and as I draw my last breath, I hope to be able to run through every little part of my life, remember and re-experience all those little moments that in the ocean of memory drops have been forgotten on the way. That every moment is like a brick. At that very moment, I will want to feel proud of myself, feel proud of how I lived my life and how I hopefully made other people’s lives better.
That final moment will be a test of my character, through the wrongs and the right, through the mishaps and the accidental luck. This vision, therefore, becomes a drive for me. A drive to fully make use of every day, to value moments, even this very one when I’m typing during a break at work. When I have friends and colleagues around me. My friend Ella to my left, whom I took a walk and had a good conversation with around lunch. Joakim, whom I will join for a seminar on inspiration in a few hours. Karin, whom I walked to the store during lunch to get tea and discuss ways of categorizing people in positive or negative ways, and why it is that people do this. Belinda, whose video from the other day I will make time to watch. And on it goes through the other people at the office, the people I meet on the streets outside and the people I interact continuously with online. They all make up a canvas of possibilities for making myself proud of this day by making their life better, and add those good drops to the ocean, and another brick.
For maybe, as you’ve seen in my Good Talk series where I have shared these moments, when I’m at my low, when I’m at my darkest, one or more of these people will pull their hand down into the shade and lift me up.
So make sure that you help and support other people in your life. For the reward will shape itself in some way, not the least within yourself. Remember, it’s not about Emerald city, it’s about every brick on the yellow brick road on the way there. That will be what it’s all about, regardless if I’m in my twenties, thirties or the coming forties. And when you see me, please remind me of these words.
Good talk!
Good Talk is an ongoing series where I talk about my own experiences with different feelings, personal thoughts, and dreams on a personal level. Good Talk is meant to be a conversation of spreading positivity and inspiration where I just open up for discussion in the comments, and where you, the viewer gets to share your thoughts on the topic of the video. Feel free to post long comments, and even better, respond to other people. That way it becomes a two-way communication where we can all learn from each other’s experiences, regardless of where in the world we live. Thank you all for being a part of something that is very special to me.
Leave a Reply